New Submission
by asuna-chibi
Summary: This is a story about,you know,the usual SasoDei coupling and all that jazz.Well,there's this girl who comes in and tries to steal Sasori away from Deichan,but actually ends up almost killing him.Please R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1:May 22nd**

**One day in Akatsuki Lair,Rei-dono was sitting in his office when Sasori came in with the biggest frown in the world.Rei-donno was curious,and wondered why he was frowning that big**."_What's up,Sasori?"_**Rei-donno asked.Sasori was moving his lips,but no words came out**."_**What's wrong,Sasori?!"**_**Rei-donno repeated himself.Sasori looked up and opened his mouth**."_Today...Deidara...birthday..."_**Sasori said very dryly.Rei-donno's face lit up**."_Oh,so today's May 22nd already?"_**Rei-donno asked with a big smile on his face.**

**Sasori and Rei walked out of the room together,talking.Then:**

_Flashback-_

_"Hey,Sasori-danna,yeah?!"_**Deidara called out.Sasori turned his head towards the annoying voice.**"_What?"_**Sasori asked,non-interested.Deidara skipped,literally skipped,towards his partner.**_"Guess what tomorrow is,yeah!"_**Sasori's eyes widened.He turned forcefully towards Deidara.**_"No..."_**Sasori said in a frightfull tone.**_"Yeeeeeeeeeeeeees..."_**Deidara said in a mischevious tone,**_"MY BIRTHDAY,YEAH!!!"_**Sasori's heart beated fearfully at what Deidara had in mind THIS time.Last year,he dressed Sasori up in a clown costume and made him walk around the whole Akatsuki Lair singing "Happy Birthday".And the year before THAT he had his face dunked in the cake instead of Deidara.Sasori thinks the cake part was Kisame's plan,but other than that year,he had the worst times with Deidara on his birthday.But this year would be different.**_"Umm,Deidara,what do you have in mind for this year?"_**Sasori asked,worried.Deidara rubbed his chin,thoughtfully.Then,he smiled creepingly.**_"I'm going to have you..."_**He was interrupted by Sasori's touch upon his shoulder.Sasori's smiled gently,leaving Deidara very confused.Deidara knew how much Sasori hated his birthday parties,but he loved to see him squirm.**_"How about I throw you a birthday party?"_**Sasori asked,making things up as he went along.Deidara's face lit up."**_That's sounds great,yeah_**."Deidara exclaimed.Sasori sighed in relief.Deidara was about to run off until he stopped and turned to Sasori.**_"Don't forget,Sasori-danna,you have till tomorrow,yeah."_**Deidara said,and Sasori looked sick.When Deidara left,Sasori slammed his face into his pillow.**

_Reality-_

_"Oh-no!I still have to throw Deidara a party!If I don't,he'll be crushed.He really thought I would do that?"_**Then,Sasori looked up and saw Rei looking confuzzled.Sasori was staring,actually glaring,at him.**_"Wow,Sasori.I didn't know you cared about Deidara that much."_**Rei smiled.Sasori just glared.Then,Sasori's face expression changed.**_"Your right,Sir Leader."_**Sasori said,smiling.Rei looked down.**_"Then I will just crush his little heart,and not throw him a dang thing."_


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:Deidara's Surprise

_"What do you mean 'break his little heart'?You can't do that,you'll break his heart!"_**Rei exclaimed.Sasori snickered.**_"Exactly.."_**Then,Rei sighed.**_"You know,Deidara really looks up to you,Sasori.And all you'll do is let him down.You should really consider his feelings next time,or don't make a promise you can't keep."_**Then,Rei walked off.Sasori thought about what Rei said,and sighed.**_"Fine,I'll throw him...a party."_

**Noon in Akatsuki Lair,Sasori was getting everyone ready for the surprise party.But it wasn't an ordinary party,there was Halloween decorations and toilet paper everywhere.Even chicken bones(provided by Zetsu)hanging on the walls.The party hats were made of leftover skin from one of Sasori's puppets.And the presents,you don't wanna know about the presents.The presents were:**

**From Kakazu:0.1 cent(probably the only good present)**

**From Hidan:A book about praying,and he wrote "and killing" on the bottom.So the title is:"A book about praying** **and killing**

**From Zetsu:Human limbs**

**From Tobi:A skirt**

**From Sasori:Poisons**

**From Rei:One of his peircings**

**Deidara walked into the living room,it was dark and quiet.He found the light switch and flickered on the lights.Everybody popped up.**_"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"_**Deidara's eyes glowed with happiness.He ran over and hugged Sasori.Sasori looked at Rei,who gave him the thumbs up.**_"Well,time for your presents."_**Hidan said,handing Deidara the present he gave him.When Deidara opened it,he looked confused.He lifted the book up and read the title aloud.**_"A book about praying and killing,yeah?"_**Everybody turned their attention to Hidan,who was smiling.**_"Yep,it tells you the prayers I say before I kill someone."_**Hidan smiled.Deidara looked confused.**_"Well,umm,I don't know what to say,yeah."_**Deidara WAS confused.Then,he put the book down and opened Kakazu's present.When he opened it,he looked stunned.**_"What a generous gift,yeah?"_**Deidara tried to make up a nice comment to his stupid gift.Everybody turned to Kakazu,who was counting lots and LOTS OF MONEY!**_"Oh,umm,yeah.Your welcome."_**Kakazu said,then got back to counting.When Deidara came to Zetsu's present,everybody had to try and take it away for later.So,Deidara got Tobi's present instead.**_"WHAT THE,YEAH...!"_**As Deidara looked at the mini-skirt Tobi had packed for him,Tobi was laughing his head off.Deidara glared at Tobi and just put the skirt back in the box,placed the box in the fireplace and burned it.Tobi stopped laughing and started crying.Deidara,snickering,went to Rei's present.**_"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"_**Deidara saw the piercing and threw the box down.He turned to Rei,who was smiling greatly.**_"What is that,yeah?!"_**Deidara asked,surprised and scared.Rei justed stared at him and handed him the present Sasori got him.Deidara's face lit up as he saw how big the box was.He thought it was going to be mounds of clay,or new hand jutsus.He was so excited.But when he opened the box,he laughed.He just kept laughing and laughing and laughing.Everybody looked in the box.POISONS?!**_"THANK YOU,YEAH!"_**Deidara said,hugging everybody.Then,Tobi stopped crying.**_"Wow,I guess this party went great even though we put it all together in 15 minutes."_**Everyone stared at Tobi.Deidara stopped smiling.**_"What,yeah?"_**Deidara looked at Sasori.**_"You put this together in only 15 minutes,yeah...?"_**Sasori looked at the floor.Deidara started to growl.**_"DID YOU,YEAH?!!!!!!!"_**Then,Sasori got angry and looked up.**_"__**SO WHAT IF I PUT YOUR PITTIFUL PARTY TOGETHER IN ONLY 15 MINUTES?!DO YOU THINK I WANTED TO EVEN THROW YOU A PARTY,NOOO! I JUST FELT BAD ABOUT WHAT SIR LEADER SAID ABOUT 'CONSIDERING FEELINGS AND NOT MAKING PROMISES I CAN'T KEEP'!I HATE YOU AND YOUR LOUSY BIRTHDAYS!SO JUST GET OUT OF MY LIFE AND SHUT-UP!!!!!"**_**Then Sasori stormed out of the room.Everyone turned to Deidara,who was to hurt to move.Then,after about 5 minutes of standing still,Deidara ran out of the livingroom.He ran past Sasori,who was so MAD he wanted to kill Deidara.When he saw him run past him,and he chased after him,holding his kunai forcefully in his hand.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3:Death By A Mile**

**As Deidara ran,Sasori chased him,whom was chased by Itachi.When Deidara looked back,he saw Sasori's red head chasing after him.So,Deidara tried to run faster,but Sasori already caught up with him.**_"W-what are you doing,yeah?"_**Deidara asked,scared.But he just saw Sasori lift his head,with an evil smile upon his cheeks.**_"This is your birthday present,Deidara."_**Sasori came at Deidara with full force.Deidara tried to run back,but Itachi got in his way.**_"I-ITACHI,HELP ME,YEAH!"_**Deidara ran into Itachi's arms.Itachi hugged him to protect,and turned his back towards Sasori.**_"NOBODY TURNS THEIR BACK TO ME!!!"_**screamed Sasori.So,instead of Deidara getting stabbed,Itachi did.Itachi gasped as the kunai went deeper into his back.**_"D-Deidara.."_**Itachi said,and Deidara looked up at him.Deidara could see the blood dripping from Itachi's mouth,onto his face.Deidara squeezed tighter onto Itachi.**_"Deidara,look at me..."_**Itachi struggled to say.Deidara lifted his head,and Itachi saw him crying.**_"W-why?!WHY?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"_**Deidara screamed to Sasori.**_"WHY DID YOU DO THAT,YEAH?!__WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM,YEAH?!!!__"_**Deidara said,coming towards Sasori,angry.Sasori could see then what he had done.So,he dropped his kunai and hugged Deidara.Deidara fell on top of Sasori,and looked down at him.**_"__Why,why did you do it,yeah...?"_**Deidara whispered.Then,Deidara laid his head on Sasori's chest and began crying uncontrollably.Then,Sasori hugged onto Deidara tighter.**

**When Deidara woke up from his nap,Sasori was hovering over him.He looked over at him.**_"Hi,yeah."_**Deidara said,sleepy.When he didn't get a reply,he looked at Sasori again.Sasori just stared at him.Deidara thought he was asleep,so he shook him.But nothing happened.So,he put his face in front of Sasori's,but nothing happened again.Then,Sasori lifted his hand really fast and grabbed Deidara's neck.Deidara was struggling to call for help,but he couldn't because Sasori held on tight.**_"Maybe you haven't noticed,but your little Itachi is fine.__I'm doing this for you!So that you won't ever run from me,I'll make you a puppet!"_**That finally got Deidara.He screamed really,really loud.Everybody ran in.Deidara was held against the wall as Sasori choked him.People tried to get Sasori off Deidara,but Sasori held onto Deidara like a dog and a flea.Deidara's face was growing red,and he gasped for breath.**_"SASORI,STOPPIT!"_**Tobi called and grabbed Sasori's arms.He finally got a kunai and stabbed them into Sasori's arms,but that had no effect.Sasori just turned his head forcefully to Tobi and slapped him back.**_"You know what,Deidara?You'll be all mine when I'm done with you.."_**Deidara gasped and tried to kick Sasori off,but Sasori just pushed his legs up against his own.Sasori flashed everyone a mean glared,but nobody backed out.Everyone came to Sasori with full force.Sasori took them all down in 5 minutes.Even Rei.But he forgot one more,Itachi.Itachi stepped in the room,not letting Sasori detect his presence.**

_"Sasori,let him go."_**Itachi said in his monotone.Sasori turned around and saw Itachi alive and well.**_"So,I guess your still alive after that blow,eh,Itachi?"_**Sasori said,holding onto Deidara tighter.Itachi could see Deidara's face growing purple.Sasori then dropped Deidara and let him flop to the ground.Itachi could see Sasori rumaging through his desk.Then,he pulled out the birthday present he got for Deidara.The poisons.Sasori looked up and saw Itachi had vanished.**_"Now that that's over..."_**Sasori said,then turned to see Itachi picking Deidara up bridal stlye.Sasori got red hot mad and charged after Itachi,but Itachi jumped out of the way and ran out of the room.Sasori started to pound on the walls and throw things out the window.Then,he thought of a brilliant plan.To kill the Uchiha...**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:**BE NICE!**

**Saspri ran after Itachi as Itachi laid Deidara down softly on the ground.Sasori saw this,and ran after Itachi again.Itachi took out a kunai and blocked Sasori's throw.Itachi pinched Sasori's neck,and made Sasori fall aslep.When Sasori woke up,he and Deidara worked everything out and where called to the Grand Hall for a meeting.**

_"We have a new Akatsuki member joining us today."_**said Rei.**

**Everyone stared at the little 5'4 girl.She had cute brown eyes.She also had a very cute kimono on as well.She smiled her innocent little smile.Everybody was disgusted! ****"**_Hehe,hello."_**She said,and she tilted her head to the side.The leader was waiting for everyone to say hi back,but there was no answer.**_"I don't mean to rush you,BUT BE NICE AND HURRY AND SAY HELLO ALREADY!!"_**Rei screamed.Everybody snapped out of their little trance and said "hi" in monotone.The little girl was confused and opened her eyes.She looked up at Rei and frowned.**_"Do they even like me?"_**asked the little girl in her sweet voice.Rei looked down at her and smiled.**_"They better..."_**he mumbled to himself.The girl looked up to him.But he just smiled.**_"I SAID BE NICE!!!"_**Rei screamed at everyone.Then everyone rushed up to say hi and shook her hand and stuff like that.Everyone except Deidara.Rei walked over to Deidara and looked at him closely.He seemed to still be in his little trance.**_"What's wrong,Deidara?"_**asked Rei leader,but Deidara didn't answer.But Rei could see him smiling.Deidara turned his head to Rei leader and smiled brightly.**_"What's her name,yeah?"_**Rei was happy to see Deidara care about the new girl.**_"Her name is Lili."_**Rei said.Deidara looked at Lili and frowned.Then,he turned towards Rei and smiled again.**_"Well,I guess we have a new guest in the house,yeah."_**Deidara said,making his way to her.But Rei leader stopped him.**_"She's not a guest,she's staying."_**Deidara frowned again.**_"But how can that be,yeah?Only Akatsuki can stay in here,yeah?"_**Deidara said.Rei looked into his eyes.**_"She is an Akatsuki."_**Deidara had a mean scowl.**_"BUT SHE CAN'T BE AKATSUKI,SHE'S TO NICE,YEAH!"_**Deidara said,getting everyones attention.Even Lili's.While Deidara and Rei leader where ruffing over Lili staying or not,the others gathered around Lili again.Her big brown eyes seemed to attract them.Even Sasori.**_"She doesn't belong here,yeah!"_**Deidara screamed.Lili looked over and saw that they were pointing to her.**_"Umm,excuse me?"_**Lili said in her cute voice.**_"WHAT,YEAH?"_**Deidara screamed back.Lili got mad at that.Her eyes filled with hatred.**_"YOU BETTER BE NICE,OR I'LL KILL YOU!"_**Deidara looked over to Rei leader,who was smiling and nodding his head.**_"So,now does she deserve to stay?"_**Deidara crossed his arms and turned his back towards everyone.**_"WHATEVER,YEAH!"_**Then Deidara stomped into his room.But when he got there,there was a big surprise.His room was destroyed.He fixed it all morning.Sasori is going to kill him!**

**He frantically searched the room.**_What the,yeah...?"_**Deidara heard the door open.So he hid under the bed.When the person walked in,he could hear a scream.It had to be Sasori because nobody else walks into their room,and it was a guys scream.**_"DEIDARA?!"_


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5:The last of him...**

**As Deidara packed his things,Sasori walked in the room.**_"Deidara,what are you doing?"_**Deidara turned around and held his package over his shoulder.**_"I am going,yeah."_**Deidara said,walking past Sasori.Just before Deidara got of reach,Sasori grabbed his hand.Deidara turned around.**_"Why the heck are you going?"_**Deidara pulled his hand out of Sasori's grasp.**_"Because of the new girl,I'm not wanted..."_**Deidara dropped his bag and turned to face his partner.**_"Since 3 days ago,everybody's been ignoring me,Even you,Sasori-danna,yeah."_**Sasori looked at Deidara with a straight face.Then,he grabbed Deidara by the shoulders.**_"And you're jealous of THAT?"_**Deidara put his head down and started to cry.Sasori snickered.**_"WHY ARE YOU SNICKERING,YEAH?!"_**Sasori ignored Deidara's sudden out burst and kissed his eye.The tears of Deidara wettened Sasori's lips.Deidara hugged onto Sasori's robe.**_"Wow,that's quite some relationship you two have..."_**said a girl's voice.But an evil voice.They turned to see Lili standing in their doorway.She was snickering at her rude comment.Sasori glared at her and she glared back.For a couple of minutes,they glared each other down.But since Lili was human she walked out of the room.And in the hallway,she was blinking like she never blinked before.When Hidan saw her,he thought something was wrong,so he walked off,scared.When she looked back in the room,she saw Sasori talking to Deidara.She caught sight of his amber eyes.She stared and stared,then she thought of a brilliant plan,to break them up.**

**Two weeks after her arrival,Lili has been watching Sasori.Everything he did.Except in the bathroom,she didn't want to stalk him.Deidara caught this when she stared at him at breakfast.Deidara watched with anger as she tried to get near Sasori,and Sasori would let her.He doesn't even let ****him**** get that near.**_"So,umm,Sasori.What brings you out on this fine day?"_**Lili said,blushing a little.Sasori saw her blush and smiled.**_"Well,I haven't been out for a while."_**Sasori answered.Deidara gasped as Lili laid her head upon his shoulder.**_**"What are you doing?"**_**said a voice behind Deidara.Deidara turned to see Zetsu.**_"Oh,Zetsu.I'm just seeing stuff,yeah..."_**Zetsu looked at Deidara curiously,then shrugged.**_**"Well,Sir-Leader wants to see you."**_**Deidara looked curiously.When they arrived at Rei's office,Rei looked peaed off.**_**"WHAT'S THIS ABOUT YOU TRYING TO LEAVE AKATSUKI?!HMM?TELL ME,**__**TELL ME!!**__**"**_**Deidara looked at the ground.Then,Rei lifted his face to his.**_**"I said tell me!"**_**Deidara got out of Rei's hands and backed away.**_**"BECAUSE NOBODY LIKES ME ANYMORE,YEAH!!!!!"**_**Deidara pushed his way through Zetsu and ran out of the office.He ran back to the hidding place he was before when he was watching Sasori and Lili.Oh,no!He was nervous because he didn't know what they did when he was gone!When he ran back to the hidding place,he was surprised to see they hadn't moved a muscle.Except for Sasori,who was stroking her hair!**_"What is he doing to her,yeah?"_

**At dinner,when Sasori tried to talk to Deidara,he would just ignore him and talk to Itachi.Sasori was really confused.In their room,Deidara had his back to the door.**_"What's your problem,eh?"_**Deidara didn't even bother to turn and face him.He just kept his back to him.Lili walked in before anything interesting happened.**_"Umm,Sasori-danna,you said you'd take me to get some desert."_**Deidara gasped at two things,one,she and him were going to desert?And two,SHE CALLED HIM SASORI-DANNA!!**_"That's it.."_**Deidara mummbled under his breath.He charged for Lili until Sasori got in the way.Deidara stopped right in front of Sasori.Deidara looked up at Sasori,who protected Lili.Deidara got so mad at that,he grabbed Sasori by the shoulders and threw him at the wall.But,Sasori landed safely on the window.Deidara was surprised to see Sasori could even do that,considering he's a big lump of wood.Then,Sasori came out to get Deidara...**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6:It's just a kiss...**

**Sasori ran to Deidara,but actually,he ran past him.He ran over to Lili and kissed her.Deidara saw and started to grow red stinkin' hot!They had a long kiss too,on the lips.After about what seemed like 50 hours,they stopped.Lili was blushing 9,893 shades of red.Sasori looked over his shoulder a little bit.Deidara was to stuned and hurt to move or talk.He just stared with wide eyes,his mouth hanging open.Deidara got called up to Rei's office again.**_"So,you seemed left out since the new girl got here?"_**Deidara noded.**_"So,I guess there is no use for you,huh?"_**Deidara shook his head.**_"Ok,then.SASORI!"_**Sasori came in and sat in the chair near Deidara's,but not right beside it.**_"So,Deidara told me you don't pay attention to him anymore,is that true?"_**Sasori looked to Deidara,then back at Rei.**_"No..."_**Deidara looked to Sasori and stood up.The chair squeaked behind him.**_"YOU KNOW THAT ISN'T TRUE!YOU EVEN KISSED LILI,YEAH!"_**Sasori widened his eyes.How could Deidara say that aloud?So,Sasori stood up,too.**_"So,you're just jealous!"_**Deidara got really mad at that.**_"You're lucky you've met me,yeah!"_**Sasori clenched his teeth.**_"No,you're lucky you've met me!"_**Deidara backed up.**_"Actually,I'm not,yeah.I wish I had never met YOU,YEAH!!!"_**Deidara stormed out of the room.Sasori and Rei watched as Deidara slammed the door behind him.Then,Lili came in.**

_"Wow,poor Deidara.You let him down for goody two shoes over there..."_**Kisame said.Sasori glared at him and went back to thinking.**_"Well,hey.I got through his birthday,I could get through this."_**Sasori stood up,but Itachi pushed him back down.**_"That was only 5 minutes of thinking.You need more than that to tend a broken heart."_**Sasori looked at Itachi,but sat back down.After 55 minutes,he jumped up.**_"Ok,it's been a whole hour,can I go now?"_**But Itachi fell asleep.Kisame was sleeping on his hand,then his head hit the table.Sasori just looked back and forth from all the sleeping Akatsukis.So,he went to find Deidara.But,then Lili popped out.**_"Where you going,Sasori-danna,yeah?"_**Sasori looked at Lili.He just stared at her.Then,she started laughing like crazy.**_"I was mocking him!"_**Sasori didn't have the time to laugh.He tried to get away from Lili,but she kept blocking his way.Then,he looked down into her eyes and saw something he'd never see in a eye before.There was this twirling thing,not Sharigan.It was like hypnosis,sort of.He tried to look away,but her eyes hypnotised him already.When he finally blinked,he put his arm around her shoulder and walked to the backyard with her.When Kisame finally woke up,he saw Sasori and Lili walking together.**_"I-Itachi,l-look."_**Itachi looked at Sasori and Lili,then sighed.**_"Maybe he just doesn't love Deidara anymore."_**Itachi and Kisame looked at eachother nervously.Itachi and Kisame both followed Sasori and Lili.They were spying on them from the window.Sasori and Lili were having some sort of ritual.**

_"Listen here,Sasori-danna.This cat here is called the Hikaru.And this one is called Kaoru.Hikaru is a cat where if you put someones name on here,you'll curse them forever.No matter what.And Kaoru is a good cat,if you put someones name on here,you give them good luck.The best luck they could ever have."_**Lili handed the cats to Sasori.Sasori looked over them carefully and put Kaoru down.Lili could see it was Hikaru.Lili smirked.**_"Who's name is going to be on there?"_**Sasori looked up and got back to writing.Lili sat down and watched for several seconds.Then,Sasori looked up.**_"Who,who who?!"_**Lili was anxious to see who it was.But Sasori just put the cat(Hikaru)in his robe.Lili looked disapointed,then Sasori picked up Kaoru(the good cat).He was writing a really short name.Lili got excited,because her name was really short.Then,Sasori got up and ran off.Lili looked at him and sighed.**_"Maybe I'm being a little to evil?NO!"_

**Sasori searched far and wide for Deidara.He checked in Itachi's room,Kakuzu's room,even Zetsu's room,big mistake.He asked where he was,but noone had a clue.Sasori was starting to feel worried.Then,he went to the river bank,it was peaceful and quiet there.Just because he was Akatsuki,doesn't mean he had a peaceful side.This is the place him and Deidara went when they first met.Sasori showed it to him.It's been such a long time,he was surprised he still knew where it was.Then,he saw Deidara sitting there,his head buried in his knees.Sasori watched Deidara for a few moments,then ran up to him.But before he could go,Lili pulled back his arm.Sasori fell to the ground.Lili smirked evily and took out 3 kunais.Sasori looked at her and smiled gently.**_"You know you can't kill me with those."_**Then,Lili smirked even bigger,which turned into a smile.**_"Who said they were for you?"_**Then,Sasori saw Lili raise them to her face.**_"DEIDARA,LOOK OUT!"_**Deidara heard Sasori's voice and turned around.He saw the kunais coming to him.He stood on his feet,but he was to late.Luckly,the kunais just went passed him,but he fell into the river.Sasori was relieved that he fell inot the pits of shallow water.But then he remembered that it's been raining alot the past few months.The river could of been full of rain water.But also,Deidara isn't that helpless,he is an S-class ranked ninja.So,he should have learned to stand on water already.That was how they got into the secret Akatsuki Lair.Sasori waited for about 5 minutes,but Deidara didn't come up yet.Sasori tried to go into the water,but Lili held him back.**_"Why are you trying to kill my Deidara?"_**Sasori held Lili's shoulders.Lili looked to the ground.**_"Because,I was trying to have fun!O.M.Gosh!You two can't take a joke.And the leader wanted me to do this,to test Deidara's strength,and to see if you two really loved each other,and you do!"_**Lili snickered.Sasori got really mad.**_"YOU CALL THIS FUNNY?!KILLING OFF DEIDARA?"_**Sasori yelled in Lili's face.But she just raised an eyebrow.**_"Uh,YEAH!"_**Sasori looked at her seriously.Then,Lili softened up.**_"Hey,don't get mad at me.Take your anger and angst out on Sir Leader or something."_**Sasori looked over at the water.Deidara still didn't come up.**_"Well,will you come with me to save Deidara?"_**Lili looked up at Sasori.**_"Can't you do it by yourself?"_**Sasori looked mad.Then,sighed.**_"No,I'm made of wood.And wood would explode in water.Not a big explosion,just a little one."_**Lili was chuckling under her hand.**_"What...?"_**Lili looked up,crying from laughing to hard and not letting it out.**_"You said...wood would!"_**Lili couldn't hold it in anyomre.She busted out laughing.**

_"Will you help me or not?!"_**Lili looked serious.**_"Of course!"_**Then,Sasori and Lili ran to the river.**_"Well,since your wood-boy,Pinnochio,I'll go."_**Lili jumped in and saw Deidara at the bottom.**_Wow,that's so fair!_**Lili didn't take notice that she couldn't breathe anymore.She just ignored it and moved on.When she got ot the bottom,Deidara was just floating there,eyes half way open,mouth hanging open alittle as well.Lili knew that face.It happened to her parents.She was to late,he drowned...**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7:Misery among all...**

**Sasori stared as Lili arose from the water.Deidara held in her arms.He ran over to them and sat Deidara in his arms,eyes still half opened.**_"So,is he ok?"_**Lili looked to the ground.Sasori straighten and got the courage to ask again.**_"Well?"_**Lili looked more to the ground.Sasori understood.Deidara was gone,and he wasn't coming back.Sasori put him down on the grass near the river.Lili saw his eyes quivering with tears.She placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.Then,he picked Deidara up and walked over to the river.As Lili watched,she saw a tear fall from his eye.She tried to smile,but tears came out as well.Then,she ran over to Sasori.He was about to drop Deidara back in the river.She grabbed his arm and tried to pull him away.**_"What are you doing?!Don't you want to keep him?"_**Sasori looked back.**_"No..."_**Lili opened her eyes.She looked up and saw Sasori staring down at her,expressionless.**_"W-why not?I don't understand."_**Sasori looked at her again.**_"__Why keep this stupid dead corpse anyway?I'll either make him into a puppet or throw it away..."_**Lili looked hurt.She grabbed Deidara and laid on top of him.**_"I WON'T LET YOU TAKE HIM AWAY!!NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"_**Sasori just stared at her hugging onto Deidara.She was crying,too.Sasori just stared and thought of a way to make Deidara stay without him rotting away.**

_In Deidara's Mind"_

_Where am I,yeah?"_**Deidara said,looking around.Then,he saw something floating about.He moved a little closer to get a better look.It was like a spirit,his spirit!It looked exactly like him.He saw the spirit raise its hand and touch his face.The spirit was cold and dead.**_**"You have to go back..."**_**said the spirit.Deidara just looked at it confused.Then he backed away.**_"What do you mean go back,yeah?"_**The spirit came closer.But it wasn't the same spirit,it was a girl one.It looked like his mother.**_"Mother,yeah?"_**The other spirit chuckled.It had a young,pretty chuckle.**_**"Why has everybody been calling me their mother later?"**_**she asked to the other spirit.**_**"I don't know,maybe they're just fond of you..."**_**said the boy spirit.**_**'This one's a little to big to adopt."**_**said the girl.Then,the boy bent close o Deidara's face.**_**"Sorry,pal.Looks like...you don't have a place here..."**_

**As Deidara opened his eyes,he was in some sort of water.It had to be the river.But,how can that be when he was breathing it all in with out it getting clogged in his nose.Then,he lifted his head and found out it was Genjutsu.He was floating in it like an angel.He felt weird,sort of violated.Then,he saw that he was in a glass tube,like an alien perservative.And ALL Akatsuki eyes were on him.He looked through the glass back at everyone,with astounished faces.Some how,he had all black eyes for a moment.He must still be dead.He couldn't move,he felt like he was being controlled by something.There were tubes in his sides .He felt them,and tried to break out of the glass.Everybody still stared at him.Where his eyes still black?**_"Let-"_**Deidara could finally fill his stomach sucking in.He looked down and saw the tubes sucking out blood.He felt tremondous pain,then,he started to cough up blood.He was trying to pull the tubes out,but then they just went in deeper.It was pulling him down.He couldn't hold his breath for long.Then,everything started to get blury.He couldn't see Itachi,Kisame,Zetsu,Tobi,Rei Leader,Hidan,Kakuzu or his Sasori-danna.He put his hand on the glass and tried to reach out for Sasori.But they all took a step back.Deidara saw Sasori laughing.Why was he laughing?Does he even care anymore?DOES HE?!Deidara just grasped on to the tubes and pulled and tugged and pulled and tugged again.Then finally,they came off.Blood spewed everywhere in the water.So much blood,but Deidara didn't care.He tried to break open the glass.When he punched it,it cracked a little.Then he punched it again and again.It finally broke open.The glass,and his knuckles.He jumped out of the tube and,with blood spilling everywhere,and ran over to Sasori.He couldn't run that fast,so he stopped like 2 inches away from him He stared into his amber eyes and fell in his arms.Sasori held tight onto him**_."Today you'll die,Deidara..."_**Sasori said.Deidara looked up to him.**_"What,yeah?"_**Sasori's face was morphing into a demon .Then,he twisted his arm off and there was a knife sticking out.**_**"TODAY YOU'LL DIE!!!!"**_**Sasori said in a deep,demon voice.He stabbed the knife into Deidara's side,and more blood leaked out.Sasori leaned closer to Deidara and whispered in his ear.**_"You need to...AWAKE!"_

_Reality_

**As Deidara opened his eyes,he saw Sasori giving him CPR(mouth to mouth).Sasori gave it to him for about 2 hours and 50 minutes.Lili didn't take her eyes off them for that long.She didn't even blink yet.Deidara opened his eyes alittle wider,trying to give Sasori the picture that he was awake.But Sasori didn't see that yet.He was to busy breathing.Then,Deidara lifted his hand a little.Lili saw this,and started to get all excited.**_"MY GOSH,SASORI HE'S ALIVE!!!!!!!!!"_**Sasori opened his eyes and saw Deidara's pretty blue eyes.Sasori hugged onto Deidara and Deidara hugged back,even though it took all his strength to do so.Back at the Akatsuki Lair,everyone was mournful and sad and depressed,everything emo.Even Tobi(and that's really saying somethin').**_"Well,there's nothing we can do now.Deidara's gone,just like Sasori said."_**Tobi said,sadfully.Itachi went to the window and saw Deidara being carried by Sasori.Itachi turned to all the mourning Akatsuki.**_"Hey.."_**Itachi started,but everyone sighed.**_"I should have paid more attention to him."_**said Rei Leader.**_"You guys..."_**Itachi said again,trying to get everyones attention.**_"I should have givin' him the clay for his birthday instead of that silly man-skirt.Even though it was sweddish and it cost all of Kakuzu's-I mean my money."_**Tobi said,looking at Kakuzu.Kakuzu growled.**_"SO THAT'S WHERE ALL MY MONEY WENT,HMM?!DID IT?!"_**Tobi ran out of the room.**_"You guys-"_**Itachi said,now getting frustrated.**_"WHY OH WHY IS HE GONE?!"_**cried Kisame.Itachi did his "Mangekyo Sharingan" .**_"I SAID LISTEN YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!!"_**Itachi yelled.Everyone turned to Itachi who blew a hole throught the wall.Itachi pointed to the window and everyone went over to see what Itachi was pointing at.**_"DEIDARA?!"_


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8:LOVEHOLIC**

_"O.M.Gosh!Deidara is alive?Really?"_**Tobi screamed as Hidan told him the great news.Tobi ran from his room to the riverbank where Sasori and Lili were.He saw Deidara in Sasoris hand and jumped for joy.**_"Deidara-sempai,Deidara-sempai!"_**Deidara looked over at Tobi and smiled a little bit.He was still in so much pain from the dream and from holding his breath for that long.**_"Ummm,Tobi,can you please?"_**Sasori said,motioning his head to Tobi to make him back up.And,Tobi did.Sasori walked Deidara into the room they shared.Sasori laid Deidara onto his bed.Deidara looked up at Sasori and smiled.Sasori smiled back.**_"Thank you,Sasori-danna,yeah..."_**Deidara said before falling asleep.Sasori stared at Deidara as he drifted off into a deep sleep.Sasori walked out of the room,and found everyone at the door,staring in disbelief.**_"So,is it true?"_**asked Tobi,peering into the room once again.Sasori pushed his head out of the way,and slammed the door behind him.He walked furiously out of the room.**_"What's got bees in his underpants?"_**Tobi said before following everyone else to see where Sasori was going.Sasori stepped in front of Sir Leaders office,then,he furiously pounded on the door.**_"Come-"_**Sir Leader was about to talk,but Sasori busted in the room.Sasori went over to the Leaders desk and pounded his fists on the desk.Startled,Sir Leader looked up at Sasori,who glared at him evily.**_"WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM,EH?WHY DID YOU DO THAT TO DEIDARA?!"_**Sasori yelled at the Leader.Then,Sir Leader started to laugh.Then he laughed even harder,then harder.Sasori got really mad.He grabbed Sir Leader by the collar and pulled him close to his face.**_"This isn't funny..."_**Sasori grumbled.Then,Sir Leader got a straight face.He looked at Sasori and cleared his throat.**_"WELL,OF COUSRE IT IS!"_**Sasori slumped back into one of the three chairs in front of Sir leader's desk.Sir Leader recovered from his laughter and looked at Sasori with a serious face.**_"So,Lili told you our little secret,did she?Well,since you know that was all just to prove Deidara's strength,you shouldn't get mad.He's an S-class criminal,don't you think he can stand on his own?"_**Sasori sat up.**_"No!And especially when he's mad at me!He's gets real weak at that point because he uses up all his chakra to get his anger out,and becomes very,very fragile!"_**Sasori yelled,slumping back down.Rei looked at Sasori and then looked at his desk.**_"Well,now that that's over,can you go so I can do my work?"_**Sasori glared at the leader,but got up and walked towards the door.When he came out,he saw Lili walking out of the room.Sasori ran over to her and stepped right in front of her.**_"Where are you going?What about-"_**Sasori was about to finish until Lili put a finger to his lips.**_"Shhhhhhhhhhhhh,not another word from you.I'm going to the store,I'll be back in 5 days."_**Lili took her finger from Sasori's lips and started to walk away.Sasori stepped in front of her before she got to the front door.**_"What do you mean five days?I can't live without you for five days!"_**Lili smirked and placed a hand on Sasori's shoulder.**_?"Don't worry,you can take care of Deidara for just five days,RIGHT?!"_**Sasori stepped out of her way and moved to the side.**_"But..but I'm not letting you go to Konoha alone."_**Sasori said,crossing his arms.**_"Who said I was going to Konaha?"_**Lili said,looking around.Sasori opened his eyes and looked down at Lili.**_"You mean your going somewhere else?"_**Lili nodded.Sasori raised a brow.**_"Where to?And with who?"_**Lili sighed at all the questions thrown at her.**_"I'm going to your hometown and with Itachi."_**Lili walked past Sasori and Sasori stared in shock.**_"Oh,no!You are not going with that..that pervert!"_**Lili backed up and faced Sasori.**_"Atleast he's not Jiraiya!"_**Sasori questioned Lili until Itachi came in the room.**_"Are you ready yet,Lili?"_**Lili looked at Itachi and then at Sasori.**_"YES!THANK YOU FOR SAVING ME!!"_**Lili ran and jumped into Itachi's arms.Itachi gasped and carried Lili into the Leader's office to check out.Sasori stared at Lili and Itachi as they ran from him.Then,Sasori heard a thump coming from his room.**_"Oh-no!Deidara!"_**Sasori ran into his room to find Deidara on the floor,rolling went over and bent down next to Deidara.**_"Deidara,what's wro-uh?"_**Sasori stopped to see Deidara was still asleep.He was rolling around...in his sleep?**_"Ummmmm,Deidara?Deidara?"_**Sasori shook Deidara until Deidara popped his eyes open.He smiled and got out of the blankets.**_"How long was I asleep,yeah?"_**Deidara looked at his partner with wide,baby blueish eyes.Sasori smiled.**_"4 hours only."_**Deidara yawned and looked around.**_"Where's Lili,yeah?"_**Deidara looked around the room again.**_"Oh,her.She went with 'Itachi'."_**Sasori said in a mocking tone.Deidara got up and ran for the door.When he came back from the little Villian's room,he saw Sasori looking at his clay structures.**_"Do you like 'em,yeah?"_**Deidara said,fumbling with his cloak.Sasori looked over at Deidara and smiled.**_"Yeah,there're awesome."_**Sasori said,and walked over to Deidara.Over the last year,Sasori has grown taller than Deidara,about 3 inches.So,he's now as tall as Itachi.Lili is a little shorter than Deidara,she's 5"4 and Deidara is about 5"8.Deidara looked up at his partner and smiled innocently.**_"So,what do you want to do today,Sasori-danna,yeah?"_**Deidara said,and Sasori rubbed his chin thoughtfully.Then,Kisame came in and slapped Deidara in the back of the head.Deidara fell onto Sasori when that happened.**_"OW!!What was that for Kisame-san,yeah?"_**Deidara asked,rubbing the back of his head.He looked over and saw Sasori rubbing his head,too.**_"I...I keeeeeeeeeeeel...you..."_**Kisame said,trudging towards Deidara.Deidara rolled his eyes and looked at Sasori again.**_"What did I do this time?"_**Deidara singsonged.Kisame looked at Sasori then back at Deidara.**_"You left your bird..under my pillow...and blew off the back of my hair!"_**Kisame yelled,turning around and showing a enormous bald-spot.Deidara and Sasori tried their best to keep in their laughter.Kisame turned around and glared at Deidara.Deidara stopped and looked at Kisame.Then,Kisame stormed out of the room.Sasori looked at Deidara,and started laughing really loud.**_"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"_**Sasori held his stomach while laughing.**

_11:17 p.m_

**Sasori was relaxing on his bed,when he saw a shadow passing his head.He looked up and saw Deidara there,drying off his long,blonde hair.He was weaing a towel only,seems he just came out of the shower.Sasori stared at him while he put his hair in the casual ponytail he always wears.When he slipped off his towel,Sasori hid his face in his pillow.**_Why the heck am I looking at Deidara getting dress for?_**Sasori thought to himself.When he turned around,Deidara was in his black pants,but he had no shirt.Sasori wondered why he put on his clothes when it was time for bed,even though the Akatsuki didn't have a bedtime,this was Deidara's usual bedtime.He slipped on his shirt and went out the door quietly.Sasori followed him and saw he was headed for the river bank.When they got there,Deidara started practicing his fighting skills.And Sasori had to admit,he was really good.At about **_4:34_**,Deidara plopped to the ground.He must be tired after practicing for more than 5 hours.Sasori walked over to Deidara and helped him get up.Deidara was surprised to see Sasori there.**_"What are you doing here,yeah?"_**Deidara asked,as him and Sasori walked back to the hideout.**_"I followed you here,you're really good."_**Sasori said,Deidara admiring his words.Sasori stopped walking and looked over to Deidara.**_"How about you fight me?You know,just for training."_**Deidara stopped to and looked over at Sasori,frightened**_."No,way,you're going to kill me ,yeah!"_**Deidara yelled.Sasori just smirked and started walking again.**_"Come on,you're probably a little stronger than me.I mean,you've become very.."_**Sasori stopped and Deidara stopped with him.At once,Sasori grabbed Deidara by the arm and flipped him over.Deidara landed flat on his back.Deidara landed real hard with an Humph.**_"Wh-what was that for Sasori-danna,yeah?"_**Deidara complained,rubbing his back.Sasori leaned closer to him and helped him up.**_"Your reactions are like a turtles,not a cat,that's bad.So,you need to practice with me..or I'll kill you."_


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9:Practice,practice,pancakes?**

**Sasori and Deidara practiced till dawn.At the end,Deidara was struggling for breath.Sasori stood in front of him and crossed his arms.He didn't fight like he did when Sasori saw him practice.Deidara looked up and saw Sasori staring at him with disgrace.Deidara dropped his head again,in shame.When they walked back to the headquaters,Deidara dropped himself lazly on his bed.Sasori went over to Deidara's draw and looked at his clay creations.Deidara didn't notice,he fell asleep.**_"DEIDARA!"_**shouted a voicefrom the halls.But Deidara was a heavy sleeper when he practiced for more than eight hours.And,none other than Tobi,busted in the room.That startled Sasori and he dropped the clay structure.Sasori turned and glared at Tobi.**_"Why is Deidara-senpai sleeping?It's time to get up."_**Sasori looked over at the sleeping blonde and turned back to Tobi.**_"Let him sleep in today,he's a little tired from last night-"_**Sasori got a glimpse of Tobis face.**_"No,no,NO!NOT LIKE THAT!!!"_**Sasori said,waving his arms in the air.Tobi stared disgustedly at Sasori.**_"OK,what ever you say,Sasori."_**Tobi said in a mischevious tone.**_"GET THE HECK OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!!"_**Sasori screamed,and threw his shoe at Tobi,who ran out the door.Sasori stared back at the little sleeping Akatsuki.**_How can Tobi think that we did...EW!Not in a million,gross.._**Sasori thought to himself.After about 8 hours,Deidara woke up.Sasori turned from his work and saw Deidara lift his sleepy head.He bliked many times,and turned to Sasori.Then,he started to blush.Sasori looked confused and backed away.**_"Hmmmmmmmm,I love you so much,Sasori-danna,hmm,hmm,hmmm,yeah..."_**Deidara said,his head drifting back and forth.Sasori went over,slowly,to Deidara.He looked deep into his eyes,and got a surprise.Deidara grabbed the back of his head and kissed him!Dun,dun,duuuuuuuun!That's when,Lili walked in.**_"I'm ba-gasp"_**Lili stared in shock as Deidara kissed Sasori affectionatly.Itachi was trying to hold back his laugh.When Deidara let go,Lili was in wide-eyed shock.Sasori looked in the door way and...BAM!He had shades of red covering his whole freakin' head!Lili walked over to them and started beating the back of their heads.**_"WHY ARE YOU MAKING OUT IN A PUBLIC ROOM WHERE ANYONE CAN JUST WALK IN AND SEE THIS!!THAT WAS VERY,VERY VIOLATING!GO TO THE BATHROOM NEXT TIME,OR LOCK..THE..DOOR!!"_**Lili said,beating their heads with the shopping bag she had.Deidara and Sasori where trying to protect their heads,but she kept hitting the places they weren't protecting.After 5 mintues,Deidara was crying and Sasori was pouting.**_"Now did you learn a lesson?!"_**Lili yelled,and Sasori and Deidara both nodded their heads.Lili walked out of the room,frustrated.Deidara and Sasori looked at each other then at Itachi,who was still trying to hold in his laugh.Then,Lili came back and started hitting Itachi with the shopping bag.**_"WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING AT THEIR PAIN,WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?!"_**Lili said,making Itachi back up into the hall.Then,she slammed the door and they could hear in the halls Itachi bumping into walls.Deidara got out of the bed and went to the door.Then,he locked it.Sasori looked at Deidara and was wondering-**_WHAT THE HECK IS HE DOING,WHAT THE HECK IS HE DOING?!OH,NO!HE'S COMING!_**Deidara walked towards Sasori,like he was drunk.Then,Hidan came in,actually,he busted the door down.Deidara didn't mind,he still trudged towards Sasori.Hidan ran in front of Deidara.**_"Umm,Deidara.Stop,I need to talk to you.Hello,hello?!"_**Deidara was now trudging to Hidan.**

**Hidan was backing away,with Deidara still coming at him.**_"Sasori,what is his problem?I'm sort of scared..."_**Hidan whispered to Sasori,climbing on Deidara's bed.Deidara climbed on top of his bed,then went over to Hidan,and planted him a...KISS?!Sasori's eyes widened,along with Hidan's.Deidara gave Hidan a long kiss,too.But not as long as Sasori's.Hidan released of Deidara's kiss and ran out of the room into the bathroom.They heard water running,then puking.Deidara turned back and his drowsy eyes looked at Sasori.Sasori looked at Deidara and sighed.**_"What is your problem,Deidara?"_**Sasori asked,holding the younger companion's head away from him.Deidara was outstreching his arms to try and grab Sasori,but Sasori's arms were longer than his,so that wasn't going to happen.Deidara slipped to the ground and curled around Sasori's leg.Sasori tried to walk him off,but he was to much for him.**_"Take me to your paradise,Sasori-danna,yeah."_**Sasori stopped dragging him,and looked down at the blushing blonde.Sasori helped him up and looked into his eyes.**_"Deidara..."_**Sasori said in a lustful voice.Deidara got up and looked into his eyes.Sasori placed a hand on Deidara's cheek.Then,smiled gently.**_"...no..."_**Sasori said coldly,and slapped Deidara's cheek gently.Deidara collasped on the ground and started crying uncontrollably.**_"Oh,NOW WHAT?!"_**Sasori said,turning to see his companion rolling around on his side.Sasori couldn't help but laugh at him.**_"You look like a fool,Deidara.Stop,you're cracking me up!!"_**Sasori said,leaning over to clutch his stomach.When Lili walked in,Deidara stopped spinning,but Sasori didn't stop laughing.**_"Uh,hmm?"_**Lili cleared her throat.Sasori got wide eyes and turned to see Lili staring right at him.Lili raised an eyebrow and Sasori flenched,thinking she were to hit him.**_"WHAT THE H.E DOUBLE HOCKEY STICK IS GOING ON HERE?!"_**Lili yelled,making Sasori back up against the wall.**_"DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO KEEP IT DOWN?!"_**Lili yelled.Sasori got the courage to speak up.**_"N-n-no..."_**Lili's eyes filled with anger.**_"WELL NOW I DID,SO SHUT UP AND KEEP IT DOWN!!!"_**then Lili walked out of the room,trying to slam the door behind her,but it was broke down,so she went to go kill Hidan.Sasori looked at Deidara angrily.**_"Thanks to you,I got in trouble and almsot killed!"_**Sasori snapped,but Deidara had fallen alseep.**

_4:30 p.m_

**When Deidara woke up,he was out in the practicing field thing,where all the Akatsuki...practice.He sat up on his elbows and watched as everybody wrestled around beating eachother up.Tobi was the first to go down,by Sasori.Then Kisame,by Sasori.Then Hidan,by Sasori.Then Kakuzu,by Sasori.Then Itachi(WOW),by Sasori.Then Sasori,by Lili.Oh,yeah.Zetsu was watching,while eating a piece of chicken.**_"Way to go,Lili."_**Zetsu said,after stuffing his face.Lili looked disgusted at the carnivor eating,the blood dripping down his chin.Lili nodded,bowed and walked back towards the H.O.Deidara caught sight of this and ran back to the room he shared,scared Lili would hit him.He closed the door behind him,even though there was a huge hole in it.Sasori was sitting on the bed when Deidara had gotten there.Deidara stopped right in front of Sasori,who glared at him.**_"Oh,Sasori-danna,yeah.How did you get here,yeah?"_**Deidara asked,looking up at Sasori.Sasori just stared at him,then turned to his bed.**_"You are in SOOOOOOOOO much trouble!"_**Sasori said,leaving Deidara confused.**_"What-what do you mean,yeah?"_**Deidara said,grabbing the shoulder of his companion.**_"The way you kissed Hidan made him all..gushy on the inside,now he's throwing up like he's eaten God knows what."_**Sasori said,shrugging Deidara's hand off his shoulder.Deidara looked at the ground,dissapointed.Sasori walked out of the hole in the door.**_"Where are you going,yeah?"_**Deidara said,still looking at the ground.**_"I'm going to buy new wood..and Peptol Bismal for Hidan-san..."_**Sasori said,before trudging out of the room.Deidara went to go and plop onto his bed,but to his surprise,he landed on the floor.He got up,rubbing his head and looked around.**_"Where's my bed,yeah?"_**Deidara said,searching for his bed.He looked everywhere for his bed,Itachi and Kisame's room.Zetsu's and Tobi's room.Hidan and Kakuzu's room.When he got back to his room,the bed had to be in the place none other than...the Leader's Office.When Deidara arrived at the Leader's Office,he knocked on the door slightly,hoping the Leader couldn't hear it.**_"COME INNN!"_**Deidara heard a voice yelling from behind the door.Deidara stood there for a few gathering the courage to open the door.When he walked in,he saw his bed,full of panacakes.**_"Uh,Deidara.I'm glad you're here.I need to-"_

_"WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY BED,YEAH?"_**Deidara yelled,pointing at his bed full of soft,brown panacakes.Yes,the panacales did look good,and no,Deidara didn't have any breafast today,but that wasn't the case.Leader-sama stood up and walked towards Deidara.**_"I SAID I NEEDED TO TALK TO YOU,SO SHUT UP AND LISTEN!!"_**Deidara slumped in a chair near Leader-sama's desk.**_"I need to use yor bed for some,breakfast issue.We need these panacakes for the Akatsuki because we all are going hungry!"_**Deidara looked at Leader-sama confused,but nodded anyway.**_"OK,yeah."_**Deidara said,standing up and walking towards the door.Kisame looked at Deidara like he were to eat him.**_"What's wrong,yeah?"_**Kisame just kept staring at him.**_"Hello,yeah?"_**Deidara asked,waving his hand in front io Kisame's face.Kisame just kept staring at him.**_"You...I...hate..you.."_**KIsame said,now glaring at the frightened blonde.**_"Wh-w-what did I do,yeah?"_**Deidara asked.Kisame grabbed Deidara's arm and went to his room(Kisame's room).**_"LOOK AT THIS MESS YOUR STUPID BIRDS MADE!!!"_**Kisame growled,hanging on tighter to Deidara's arm.Deidara looked all around the room.This didn't happened because of his birds,somebody had invaded.**_"But-but I..."_**Deidara started,but was cut off by Kisame's hand covering his mouth.**_"Just save your excuses,Deidara..."_**Kisame said,and let go of Deidara's mouth and arm,then walked off.Deidara just watched Kisame walk away.**_How can that happen though?_**Deidara thought to himself.Deidara started walking down the hall,that is,until Itachi decked him.Deidara was sent flying into the walls.**_"WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT FOR,YEAH?!"_**Deidara screamed rubbing his swollen cheek.Itachi walked over to Deidara and picked him up by the shirt collar.**_"MANGEKYO SHARIGAN!!"_**Itachi yelled,and placed that curse on Deidara.Deidara entered the horrifying world of Itachi's mind combined with his.Where was he?He didn't know.He looked around and saw that the sky was reversing.**_"What the-"_**Deidara paused,and realized he was in Mangekyo.Itachi popped up and frightened Deidara that he jumped out of his thoughts.**_"Oh,Itachi-sama,why did you take me here,yeah?!And why the heck did you hit me like that,yeah?!"_**Deidara said,going closer to Itachi's face.Itachi just placed a calm and soothing hand on Deidara's shoulder and pushed Deidara down gently.**_"I know your fear..."_**Itachi said calmly,making Deidara tremble in fear.Deidara tried to back away,but,as he remembered,he couldn't move.**_"Pl-please,Itachi-sama,don't,yeah..."_**Deidara struggled Itachi to stay back,but he wasn't strong enough,so Itachi pushed him down.**_"I know your fear..."_**Itachi said again.**_"Your fear is being away...from your precious Sasori-danna.So,this is what I'll do..."_**Itachi grabbed a doll-like-Sasori he had made and it came to life.**_"Well,let's say your Sasori-danna dies and you have no way of dying,what will happen?You will be away from your Danna."_**Deidara's eyes widened,and he started to panic.Itachi held up Sasori higher,and took out a kunai.**_"NO PLEASE,STOPPIT,YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"_**Deidara screamed at Itachi.But Itachi paid no attention.He stabbed the kunai right through his big,bulging heart.Deidara screamed as the blood ran down Sasori's chest.**

_Out Side Mangekyo_

_"What is that screaming?"_**Hidan asked,as him and Kakuzu gambled.Kakuzu looked away from his cards and looked through the kitchen doors.Nobody was in sight.**_"Huh,I Doa kno'?"_**Kakuzu looked back at his cards and started taking out the pairs.**_"Don't you think we should go check out this popcicle stand."_**Hidan said,giggling at his own joke.Kakuzu just looked at him weird and rolled his eyes.**_"Who ever it is,they can handle it on their own."_


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

**Mangekyo Sharigan For Everyone**!

**As Deidara screamed his natural heart out from the outside.That's what got Hidan's attention.Hidan lifted himself from his seat,and walked into the hall and saw Itachi holding Deidara uphigher than him.Hidan started towards Itachi and approached**** him from behind.That's when a second later,Itachi turned and striked Hidan,who flew back into the wall.Deidara dropped to the floor and held his neck.Hidan lifted himself off the floor and ran towards Itachi.Itachi just looked at Hidan and dissapeared,making Hidan run into another wall.When Hidan was fully awake again,he looked over at Deidara and sighed.He got on his feet,trudged over to the weeping Akatsuki member,and carried him to his room.Hidan laided Deidara on his bed,and smiled at him.Hidan looked at Deidara and then frowned.He had saw something in his eyes,like they were bleeding or something.**_"$#$&$!"_**Hidan cursed aloud,making Kakuzu run into the room.**_"What-what's wrong,Hidan?!"_**Kakuzu said,out of breath.Hidan turned to him and put on a fake smile.Kakuzu lifted an eyebrow and walked to Hidan.He went around him in circles and looked up and down.Hidan looked nervous,and he kept following Kakuzu with his eyes.Kakuzu smiled and looked at him.**_"I know what's going on here..."_**Kakuzu said.Then he looked down and saw Deidara on the bed,unconscious.Then he looked back up at Hidan.**_"You were trying to you-know-what with Deidara..."_**Kakuzu said.Hidan's face went pale,then red,then purple.**_"__ARE YOU INSANE!?!?!?"_** Hidan voltured out.Kakuzu backed up against the door.**_"O.K,O.K,sorry,sorry."_**Kakuzu said,then left the room.Hidan mmbled under his breath,then looked back at Deidara,who has fallen asleep.**

_Midnight_

_"What the-?"_**Deidara began to say,before his mouth was covered.He was lain on his stomach and on top of someone.He struggled to be free, but nothing worked.His mouth was too muffled to scream. It had to be someone bigger,stronger and taller.Deidara struggled with all his might to be set free,but nothing worked.He tried to kick the guy in the most sensitive spot,but he couldn't reach.Deidara was beggining to loose breath.He struggled to break free,but that made the person hang on tighter.Deidara finally was able to reach his clay pouch and retrieve about a pounds worth of clay.He inserted it in his palms.Five minutes later,they produced a bird,which Deidara put it on the shoulder of the attacker.**_ " If you don't let me go,I'll blow your arm off,yeah. "_** Deidara said,making his jutsu.The attacker laughed evily,frightening Deidara.**_ " You can't blow me up,I'm strong enough to take on that bomb. " _**Said the voice.Deidara tried to look back,but the person just twisted his head back in place.Deidara decided to scream for help.He opened his mouth,but no sound came out.The attacker had tightened his grip around Deidara's neck.Deidara choked out a little squel.The attacker laughed.Deidara couldn't take it anymore,he twisted his body around,and slapped the attacker right in the face,almost breaking the arm.He then jumped out of the way and made a run for the door.But,the attacker prounced on him,making him fall to the ground.Then,he pulled Deidara's face up by his hair.**_ " So,tell me.How does this feel? "_** Then,the attacker stepped on Deidara's back and pulled up his hair at the same,causing Deidara to cry out.**_ Why does this person like to torture me,yeah?What did I do to him,yeah?_** Deidara thought.Then,the attacker removed his foot from Deidara's back and pulled him to his knees.Deidara tried to get free,but was too weak.The attacker went close to Deidara's face and breathed on him.Deidara turned his head away,trying not to smell the foul stench of the person's breath.**_ " What's wrong Deidara?Don't you like it when I pull your hair?How does that make you feel now?HUH?!HOW DO YOU LIKE IT NOW?! "_** Said the person,and pulled harder on Deidara's hair,then swinging his head around.Deidara was trying so hard to figure out who that was.But,he couldn't put his finger on it.**_ " Who are you,yeah?Why do you torture me,yeah?What did I DO,YEAH?!?!? "_** Deidara screamed,but that only made the attacker angry.So,he kicked Deidara in the back.Deidara closed his eyes,and obsorbed the pain.The attacker threw Deidara on the bed and then crawled on top of him.Deidara kicked and screamed,but the attacker shut Deidara up by pressing his lips against his roughly.Deidara's eyes widened,and the attacker kissed him harder.**

_Sasori's POV_

**I went down the hall and passed up mine and Deidara's room.He's supposed to be asleep in there,but I heard rustling,so I decide to go in there.**_ " Dei-chan,are you O- "_** I pause to see him on the ground,his cloak lifted up and his pants pulled half down.I search the room for the person who has done that to him.Then,I spot Lili walking down the hall,and I have to slam the door shut.She walks up to me and glares at me with her purple eyes.It scares the CRAP out of me when she does that.**_ " Who's in there? "_** She asks,smiling evily.I look back at the door and smile to her.**_ " Nobody.Nobody at all... "_** I lied.She looked at me suspiciously.Then,she shrugged and turned away.**

_Normal POV_

**Sasori sighed in relief and opened the door again.He flickered on the lights and ran towards Deidara.He lifted him onto the bed and searched the room again.Nobody in sight.But,who could have done it?The person probably left when Sasori slammed the door again.Dang it all!Sasori had to lay Deidara on his back.Then,he left the room.Outside stood the noneother creepy pedophile Orochimaru.Sasori gasped at his apperance.It's been a while since he's see this man.And he will never forget what he has done to the Akatsuki.Sasori grunted as the snake grabbed him by the wrist.Sasori noticed he was hiding something behind his back.Orochimaru spotted Sasori looking at his arm that was in back of him,so he smirked.Then,he grabbed Sasori's hair and lifted his face close to his.Sasori turned away.**_ " Do you want to see what's behind my back,Sasori? "_** Orochimaru said in his dasterly voice.Sasori looked up at him.Then,Orochimaru took Lili from behind his back and threw him at Sasori.**_ " HUH?! Lili-UGH! "_** Sasori gasped as Lili fell on top of him.She was crying.Orochimaru must have got her when Itachi left her by herself,STUPID WEASEL!Sasori looked back t Orochimaru and then stared at him for a moment before realizing something.If he had done this to Lili,he probably did it to Deidara.He probably overheard us talking about him,and when Deidara said, **_" We'll get Orochimaru for this,yeah..." _**This is bad.Now that Lili is hurt and Deidara,Sasori had nothing to do and he couldn't protect them both.Sasori laid Lili on her back and looked at Orochimaru,but to his surprise,he was gone. Then,Sasori heard Orochimaru's voice.**_ " Take caution,Sasori.I will get you next,so be prepared..."_** It ended,leaving Sasori frightened and confused.**_ " No telling what he has up his sleeve...next time..."_** Sasori said,searching again for Orochimaru.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11:Orochimaru,the creepy pedophile returns!**

**Sasori reported the news to Pein.Pein didn't take it to well.Well,it was better than last time Orochimaru returned.Ocasional**

**throwing of things.It was all to old.So,Sasori left the room and searched for Itachi.Sinde Orochimaru left because of Ita,Sasori decided to get him on this.When Sasori found Itachi's room,he knocked constantly on the door,looking around each corner of the room until Itachi opened the door.He yawned,rubbed his eyes and looked at Sasori with confusion.Sasori smiled,then shrugged and trudged into Itachi's room,laying both Lili and Deidara on the bed.Itachi looked over at Sasori and stalked over to him.Sasori turned and smiled to Itachi,who had rubbed his eyes until they were dark red.**_ " Why are you in my room? "_** Itachi said,closing up on Sasori.Sasori turned forcefully back at Itachi,striking him.Itachi jumped back and raised an eyebrow.Sasori sighed and motioned Itachi to sit on the bed with him.Itachi trudged to the bed and sat with Sasori,who had a trace of meloncaly on his face.Itachi was a little about him,but he didn't want to show it.**

_" OK,this is what happened.OK,O-O-Orochi-maru came back and he...well he hurt the two that are lying on the bed.And he said he were to come back for me.Well,now I'm sort of frightened.Even though I'm a puppet,I still have feelings,Ita.Ita? "_** Sasori looked over to his right to see Itachi fast asleep,lying on his side.Sasori sighed.Now what was he to do?Probably everyone else were to be asleep,too.So,Sasori walked out to the back of the hideout,were mostly people who had come back from a mission come back here to relax.Sasori laid his head on a rock.He looked up at the night sky,then saw Orochimaru's cruel face.NO!He closed his eyes,trying to get rid of the mental images he had.He knew nobody would let Orochimaru get him.But,then again,Orochimaru did get his hands on Lili,Sasuke,and Deidara.So,there was a 25 and 75 percent he were to get him.Sasori lifted his head,and looked around.There were the beautiful songs of the crickets.He listened.It was so innocent,he thought.A rustle came from the bush.He turned and stood up,ready for any fight thrown at him.Then,another rustling came from a different bush,but the first bush was still ruffling.He looked at both bushes.He started backing up,until a hand was lain upon his shoulder.He jumped back,and saw it was only leader,who had a emotionless expression on his face.Sasori clutched his talisman in fright.**_ " You scared me for a second,leader-sama. "_** Sasori said,smiling.He looked back at leader,but he didn't move.Sasori walked in front of him,and waved a worried hand in his face.Then,leader began laughing.Sasori looked at him confused.Then,he began laughing even harder.Sasori finally figured out what was going on.It was Orochimaru.Sasori turned to run,but Orochimaru caught his legs with his tongue.Sasori fell to the ground,and tried to pick himself up.Unfortunately Orochimaru's tongue was to strong for him.He was dragged to Orochimaur by his waist,his tongue searching Sasori's flesh.Sasori winced and tried to get away,but nothing worked.Sasori was finally by Orochimru's feet.He looked up at him,and stabbed his tongue with his poisoned knife that raced Orochimaru's tongue with pain.Orochimaru sucked his tongue back up.Sasori made a run for it.But,now he had made the pedophile even angrier.He chased Sasori to the opening of the HO.And right before Sasori made it,Orochimaru caught his waist.He carried Sasori down to the ground,and leaned on top of him.Sasori struggled to push Ororchimaru off of him,but it was no use.Ororchimaru leaned closer,and whispered in his ear, **_" It's too bad your not asleep,or this would be real easier..."_** Sasori looked up and sighed.This was getting really annoying.First,Deidara tried to get domenate with him,but that didn't work.And now,some stupid old ( emphasis on old )  
pedophile is trying to,too?This was driving him crazy.**

_Itachi's POV_

**As I'm walking back to my room,I hear a scream coming from outside.And not a regular scream,a scream of denial,a scream of pain.I walk towards the back and see Sasori crawling away from Ororchimaru.He looks so weak,I have to help him.But,what can I do?I go out there anyways,and slap the crap out of Orochimaru's head.He looks up at me and smiles.He gets off of Sasori and walks towards me,licking his lips.I get out three kunais and hold them to my face.Orochimaru comes closer,and so do I.He probably wasn't expecting me to,so he backs up,worried and confused.He looks back at Sasori,then back at me.But he was too late.I kicked him in the face and he flies back into the rock.Dust.Just a huge cloud of dust covers the scene.I walked to Sasori and see Orochimaru get up from the rock he has landed on.His head is bleeding alot now,and he looks steaming mad.I walked back to him and he looks up at me,breathing hardly.I stare at him with glare full eyes.He gets my message,and he dissapears.**

_Normal POV_

_" I want to thank you, Itachi. " _**Sasori said,and he pulled the blanket closer to his face.Deidara looks at him,and strokes his knee with a soft hand.Pein looks at Itachi and slaps him.Itachi,confused,looks back at him.He rubbed his cheek.**_ " Why didn't you get me, or someone else to help you? "_** Pein said,and Deidara looks at Itachi.Then,Itachi glared back at Pein.**_ " Cause I could've handled it myself. "_** Itachi said,and left the room.Deidara placed his hand on Sasori's knee again,nodded,then ran after Itachi.Itachi stormed down the hallway to his room until Deidara stopped him.He looked at the blonde with anger,and walked into his room.Deidara stood there,poundering.Then,he went to Sasori's room and walked back and forth,fingers to chin.Sasori watched as Deidara was deep in thought.Deidara stopped once in a while,then went back to poundering.**_ " How can leader do this to Itachi-sama,un? "_** Deidara said,looking at Sasori.Sasori shrugged and watched Deidara walk around his whole room.Then,Deidara stopped.He turned to Sasori,a smug grin on his face.Sasori raised an eyebrow.**_ " I know how to get leader-sama to believe Ita',yeah. " _

_" Why you lookin' at meh? "_

**Later on that day,Sasori and Deidara set up a plsn.Sasori was to wait outside for Orochimaru to come,then Deidara would get it all on tape,and show it to Leader-sama.It was a perfect plan!Sasori didn't seemed to worried about that plan,but Deidara did.He didn't know if Orochimaru was going to even show up or not.But,they still had to try.Pein was sitting in his office,alone.He was working on the next group mission they were all going to do together.That's when Itachi came in.He stumbled over a couple chairs,then finally reached his destination.The blue chair.Pein looked at his weirdly,then shrugged.Pein then stood up and put his hands behind his back.**_ " Itachi,I wanted to say to you that I am truly and most gretfully powerful.More powerful than you,more powerful then Deidara.Even more powerful than myself. "_** Pein chuckled at his little joke.But Itachi didn't move his lips at all.He just sat there,looking at Pein make a fool out of himself.**_ " Well,as you remember last night,I blamed you for not telling the truth about you coming in and gettin gmore help and BLAH BLAH BLAH,right? " _**Pein said,and looked at Itachi,who was blankly staring at him.Pein cleared his throat and walked behind Itachi,grabbing hold of the chair Itachi sat on.**_ " What's wrong Itachi? "_ **Pein said,looking at Itachi's face.Itachi abrutly turned his head and looked straight at leader.**_ " No..."_** Itachi said kind of higher pitch than usual.Then,Pein accidently bumped into Itachi's chair,making his side go in the desk.Itachi screamed with pain,and than there was a huge cloud of smoke.Itachi was actually Deidara.**_ " Oh,you are in so much trouble! "_


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12: SasoDei Moments**

**Itachi remembered Pein's hard hand go across his face,leaving a red mark.Itachi went to the bathroom and turned on the bathwater.Itachi watched the bathwater run down like a stream of confusion.That's exactly what he felt then.He turned off the bathwater and got in.Slumping his back on the back of the tub,he closed his eyes.It felt as if all his frustrations were being drained out of him.As Itachi,he saw in the corner of his eye the bathroom door opoening slowly.But,Itachi was too relaxed to care.He closed his eyes again and slid down the side of the tub.Then,he saw the door open slightly more.And this time,he saw black hair.Itachi scooched up a little and sat in the tub,waiting for the vistor to show his face.Of course,there was no one else in the Akasuki with black hair except for him and Tobi,but this person's hair was long,about down to their back.**

_" Who's there? " _**Itachi called out.The attacker didn't come out fo the doorway.Itachi sighed and sunk back into the tub.The door opened wider and then he saw the flash of black hair again.Itachi rose up and saw it was who he would thought it wouldn't be...**

**Meanwhile,with Deidara and Pein,Pein was talking to Deidara on how it was bad to trick the leader like that,and he sent him off to his room.There,Deidara poundered around,looking for a new way to get Pein-sama to believe Itachi.**

_" Danna,you are supposed to be helping me,yeah! " _

**Deidara growled,looking at his side.Sasori jumped off his bed and strolled to Deidara.He bent down and sat on Deidara's bed with him,mocking Deidara's posture.Deidara punched Sasori playfully in the shoulder.**

_" Well,Deidara,if you want leader to believe Itachi,then just go tell him,I mean,he'll probably believe you..."_

**Then,a smirk spread acroos Deidara's face.He turned his head towards Sasori and looked at him slyly.**

_" No,Danna,he won't believe me,yeah.But he might believe someone who was actually there,yeah..."_

**Sasori raised an eyebrow to Deidara.Then,Deidara went over to him and whispered in his ear his magnificent plan.Sasori smiled and went with Deidara to the leaders office.**

_2 hours Later..._

**Sasori and Deidara came out of leader's office dissapointed.**

_" I hate you Deidara..."_** Sasori said,and looked over to see Deidara smiling again.**

_ Hours Later..._

**This time,when Sasori and Deidara came out after several plans,Sasori was blazing with anger.Deidara had gone to far this time.He yelled at the leader,and got them both on a mission that will last about a year.Deidara was dissapointed,too,but he still wouldn't give up.**

_" Hey,Danna,I have a new pl- "_** He was cut off by Sasori's clasp around his mouth.**

_" No more of your crappy plans,Deidara!You got us both in a mission that will last about a year,or more!So,just stay out of the way now,O.K?I'll be making up the plans from now on. "_** Sasori realeased his hand from Deidara's mouth and was beginning to walk away when Deidara stopped him.**

_" But,Danna,this plan will work absoulutely well,un!You see,if we just- "_** This time,Deidara was cut off by Sasori grabbing his wrist and dragging him to the bed room.There,he slammed the door and went to the dresser to pack his things.Deidara looked at his Danna weirdly and walked to him.Now that trying to get leader to believe someone else was a perfectly good waste of time,he had to get everyone else to believe him first.**

**Meanwhile-**

**Itachi stared blankly at the door,awaiting for the attacker.He saw that the door opened slightly and could see more of black hair spewing in from the crack.Itachi saw that the hair was actually orange,now.This man was really getting on his nerves now,and he was trying to relax.Then,the door opened all the way and he saw who it was.The person walked in,crept over Itachi,and Itachi screamed.A scream of horror,and a scream of disbelief.It was Leader...**

I know!I'm hecka perverted-evil-

please review!


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